Big Brother Saruman
by Mornieranel
Summary: I go on a reality show/contest called Mountain of Doom with characters from the LOTR. Saurman is hosting, and its in Sauron's castle. PG13 for kissing and cussing. Hey that kinda rhymes ^^.
1. Prologue. Meet me, Mornieranel, the dark...

A/N: Hey y'all! Its me, Morniëranel ::aka Dark Princess::, and I was sitting in front of the TV, watching Big Brother 3 ::I don't know exactly WHY I was watching it::, when I decided to do a slightly-like-Big-Brother- but-not-really-fanfic-from-my-POV!! Enjoy! Oh yeah, one last note, I kinda borrowed the journal idea from Endomiel, who wrote "High School: My POV" I recommend you read it! Its really good!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own LOTR, if you thought I did, you belong in the Funny Farm. I DO own my character, Morniëranel.  
  
  
  
(----------------=+..+=-----------------) Thirteenth day of Forlithe, 1320  
  
Welcome to my journal. Do you like reading my thoughts and invading my mind? No, don't deny it, of course you do. If you didn't, you wouldn't be reading this right? Well, anyways, I've decided to keep a journal in order to record all the events of the next thirteen weeks. Because I'm going to be on Mountain of Doom!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!! It's like a reality show, but its more like a contest. And can you BELIEVE whose hosting it?! Saruman!! I almost feel a little pity for him. I heard that when Gandalf took away his staff he went to his room and practically cried his eyes out. Can you believe he named it???? Well, let me tell you a little bit about my self before we go one.  
  
My name, Morniëranel, means "Dark Princess" in Quenya, and the name suits me pretty perfectly. See, in VERY VERY ancient days, like when the earth was made, Yavanna ::the goddess:: fell in love with an elf, but the elf was in fact an evil minion, and very powerful, minion of Sauron, so I, the "fruit of their passions" ::if you like those freaky phrases:: AM a Dark Princess. Of course, I never met my mother or father, but it doesn't make much difference. When I was created, I was sent immediately down to earth. A very kind elven family in Rivendell adopted me.  
  
So, that's pretty much my story. Of course, I still have powers, excluding my Elven magic. My mother IS a goddess you know. Anyways, I can use my mind to move things, and talk to trees. Don't laugh!! The trees whisper secrets, sometimes they're good secrets, sometimes not. I don't really talk to the trees, but I can communicate with them.  
  
Now you're probably wondering how I got chosen to be a contestant on the show right? Well, I received a letter in the mail. Everyone in Middle-Earth got one, asking for people to be on the show. I REALLY wanted to be on the show, so I prayed to Yavanna to be chosen, and I was. Simple as that. Guess Mother still loves me ^^.  
  
I don't know who else is going to be on the show. I heard there will be another elf or too. Maybe the elf will be a guy. A really CUTE guy! ::sigh:: The best thing about this NOT being a reality show is that my every move will not be written down and sent to everyone on Middle-Earth. Sheesh!  
  
Ugh.I'm too tierd to write anymore. Its almost midnight. AND I have to wake up tomorrow morning at 5:30.  
  
Xoxo, Morniëranel 


	2. Wagons, food fights, and obsessive elves

A/N: The Second chapter! Yay!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anything other than myself in this story.  
  
(----------------=+..+=-----------------) Fourteenth day of Forlithe, 1320  
  
Wow, today was vveeerrryy interesting. I hope you find it as interesting as I did.  
  
First things first. I woke up this morning around 6:15, feeling very groggy, and barely remembering that I'd forgotten to set my alarm clock the night before. '  
  
'Great,' I thought to myself, 'only fifteen minutes until the wagon arrives!' Let me tell you know, I am NOT a morning person. I can't sleep at night, but when I wake up in the morning, I feel like I could sleep for eternity. Knowing I didn't have a lot of time, I somehow managed to drag myself out of bed and into the shower (where, might I add, my sleepiness came in very handy as I NICKED myself while shaving!!). I don't know how I managed it, but only ten minutes later, I had thrown on some dark brown breeches, and a very pretty, dark red,, suede halter top, put on makeup (and WITHOUT poking myself in the eye with the eye pencil ^^;;!!), packed my back pack, and stumbled out the door just as the wagon was pulling up to our house. I have a slight feeling that my mother was helping me. I love you mommy ^^!!  
  
I was the second to last person to be picked up. There were already eleven of the contestants in the wagon,  
  
'Hullo!', said one of the contestants, a Hobbit with a very thick Shire accent, 'I'm Pippin, and this is me pal Merry Brandybuck." He said with a grin, pointing to his friend sitting next to them. They look like twins,  
  
"Are you two brothers?" I asked,  
  
"Nope." Another voice answered for them, another hobbit no doubt, I could tell by her hairy feet, "But they act like brothers don't they? The Dreadful Duo!" I raised an eyebrow, at that moment the driver, a fat human in what seemed like a middle-age crisis, yelled at me to get in the wagon. I obeyed. All eleven of the contestants looked friendly. There were five hobbits (Rosie, Sam, Pippin, Merry, and Frodo), a dwarf (Gimili), who didn't look too vivacious, but rather unkempt, two men and two women (Faramir, Aragorn, Eowyn, and Arië), and one elf (Arwen). I knew her well as my father was part of Elrond's high council (Elrond was her father), and the two of us had met on several occasions.  
  
"Come sit here Morniëranel." I went and sat next to her, I was very relieved that Arwen was going to be with me for the next thirteen weeks, "So what's up?" she asked with a smile on her face, curse her and her way of waking up refreshed in the morning!!  
  
"Nothing really. Man, am I exhausted! I had ten minutes to get ready this morning!!"  
  
"Didn't you know the wagon was arriving at 6:30?" I gave her one of my 'don't-go-there' looks, Arwen could be strangely annoying at times,  
  
"Yes I knew, but I forgot to set my alarm clock." I think Arwen understood that her comment about my timing hadn't been received kindly, and she changed the subject,  
  
"Did you hear anything about the other contestant?" she whispered,  
  
"Of course not. Nobody told us anything. It was too be a complete surprise."  
  
"I know, but I heard rumors that the thirteenth contestant is another elf!"  
  
"So?" I didn't want her to know, but I was jumping inside, what if it was a male elf? I really good looking male elf!!  
  
"Well, I thought it might be interesting." I shrugged, no use telling her I was grinning inside! I pointed towards Faramir,  
  
"Whose that?"  
  
"I don't know," she lowered her voice, "but hes pretty damn hott for a human!" I smirked,  
  
"Well he's been staring at you ever since we left Rivendell."  
  
"Has he? I hope he's not some kinda freak." I studied him closely, he seemed like a nice guy, probably was too,  
  
"I doubt it," I said, "He seems really nice."  
  
"But you can never tell. Didn't you hear about what happened to poor Feòrn?" Arwen immediately went into, what I like to call, her "gossip mode". If anyone had been given the gift of gab, it was she. For the next hour or so I had to hear her talk endlessly about the life of a rich boy named Feòrn who fell madly in love with a girl who seemed to be very nice, but ended up framing him for murder and taking all of his possessions. I slowly began to fall asleep due to the fact that I had had very little sleep the night before, and Arwen's continuous chatter. I was awakened when the wagon came to a halt. Arwen was still chatting away. Now telling Rosie the story, and, too my horror, from the very beginning.  
  
I rubbed my eyes and sat up. We were somewhere in the forest, probably Mirkwood, I thought. Its not too far from Rivendell after all, and we couldn't have been riding for too long. Besides, Arwen HAD heard rumors about the last contestant being an elf. It would make perfect sense if we'd stopped in Mirkwood. Since I was extremely bored (hehe, I always feel bored when I wake up from a nap ^^;;), I decided to try and communicate with the trees. I emptied my head of any thoughts and tried to send the trees a message,  
  
"Tell me a secret." I begged,  
  
"We shall tell none, we shall tell none." Was their reply, Bummer, I thought. Trees are a lot like Magic 8 Balls. They seem to have very limited answers, and the most frequent is "We shall tell none." Stupid trees. We had to wait for the last contestant quite a while. Finally, he came. I was shocked. He was a guy, but he wasn't as I expected him to be. To tell the truth, I don't know what I really expected. I think it was his hair that gave me the shocks. His hair is very pretty. Its long, completely un- frizzy, and very nice shade of blondish/brown. I wish I had hair like that. My hair is quite plain. Its very long, to my waist, longer than Legolas' (oh yeah, that's the elf's name), but very curly. Its not frizzy, but curly, and I don't like it one bit. For one thing, I can't brush my hair unless its wet. If I brush my hair while its dry, the curls will come undone and turn into frizz (which I absolutely DESPISE. I have a tons of hair products that keep my hair unfrizzy, the way it should be).  
  
The only spot left on the wagon was on the right side of Arwen (I was on her left), so he came and sat down with us,  
  
"Hi, my name's Legolas." He didn't tell us that he was Prince of Mirkwood. Arwen immediately recognized him however and told me afterwards,  
  
"I'm Morniëranel, and this is Arwen." I said, I know I didn't NEED to introduce Arwen, but at the moment she'd been pretty speechless, almost as if she'd never seen an elf before. Of course, its not everyday you get to sit next to an Elven prince. Arwen is a princess, but she was still speechless. I think she thinks hes gorgeous because of his hair. Did I mention this before? Arwen's obsessed with her hair.  
  
"Nice to meet you." He extended his hand and we shook hands (Major DUH. Did I have to write that down for y'all to figure it out?), and then he and Arwen shook hands, and that was about it for our conversation. Everyone else in the wagon had already separated into little groups. There were the hobbits, the humans, us elves, and of course, poor Gimili who was sitting all by himself. I didn't feel bad for him, he's a dwarf, and dwarves are fat and stupid. And ugly too. I don't remember too much, I think I fell asleep again for a few more hours. When I woke, we were following the Entwash. I hoped no Ents would appear. I know they wouldn't've, Ents keep to themselves these days and no one but I know they still exist. And they are the only ones that know I'm the daughter of Yavanna. I kept having weird feelings that one would suddenly pop out and ask how my mother was. I know I know, it sounds extremely stupid, but whatever. It was when we were near Fangorn Forest that Legolas spoke again.  
  
"Well," he said in a slightly cheerful tone, I couldn't believe he was cheerful, especially after more than five hours of riding in a wagon, "Since we're going to be living with each other for the next couple of weeks, why don't we get to know each other a little better?" everyone looked at him lazily, then Arwen agreed, and jabbed me with her elbow, so I agree too, before I knew it, everyone in the wagon had agreed.  
  
'Damn that elf!' I thought to myself, "Now I'll have to talk, and I am in no mood for talking.' I was still kinda tired. Not really tired, but the tired you get when you've just woken up in the middle of the day. Ya know what I mean? Anyways, Legolas, having suggested the, I don't know what to call it, went first.  
  
"Alright then, My name is Legolas Greenleaf and I love in Mirkwood forest (big DUH). I'm 2931 years old and enjoy archery, horseback riding, and freshly squeezed lemonade." I almost cracked up, it sounded like he was on a dating show! Arwen went next, now I really think she fancies the elf,  
  
"I'm Arwen (A/N: I don't know her last name), I'm 2779 years old (A/N: That's true! She was born in 241, the timeline said so). I love mushrooms, horseback riding (she flashed a smile at Legolas), and the color red." I decided to go next, just so that all the elves would finish at once. I don't really know why I wanted to have all the elves go at the same time. Maybe it was just because I was third to agree to Legolas' idea.  
  
"My name is Morniëranel, and I'm 2909 years old. I'm an elf." I didn't wish to say a lot, the other contestants gave me queer looks. To hell with them. After that I lay back against the wagon's canvas covering and fell into a half-sleep. When I woke up again, we were very near Sauron's castle (where we'll be staying for the next thirteen weeks), and my stomach was rumbling. I dug into my pack for some lembas, "Are those lembas?" asked Sam with a plea in his eye, obviously, the voracious hobbits were yet again hungry. I think they complained of hunger about fifty times while I was awake. Thank Yavanna I was asleep for more than half the trip! I knew it would be rude to refuse giving the hobbit at least one of the cakes, but, of course, when I gave him one, I had to give everyone else one too. I only ate two lembas. Take note that everyone else had eaten while I slept. And these are the people I'll be living with for the next four months. I felt almost sick. I think I'll skip the last leg of the trip. Its too boring to describe anyways. We played a few card games, but gave up when the cards went flying out of the back of the wagon, much to Faramir's dismay, 'Those were my best cards! They were made of the finest gold!'. No one believed him, least of all me.  
  
Finally, we reached Sauron's castle. I can see all you readers breathing sighs of relief ^^.  
  
"Welcome!" Saruman was already at the door holding, what seemed to me, an overly large set of keys, "Welcome dear contestants! I hope you all had a safe journey?" I wanted to slap the smile off his face, I was hungry and annoyed, but everyone else seemed to be cheerful. Saruman led us inside. Let me tell you, this castle may be evil, but it is very cool. When you enter, there are two staircases literally stuck to each wall, and both leading upstairs (DUH), between them is a hall that leads to the kitchen, dining hall, and family room. Yes, you read right. FAMILY room. What the hell was Sauron thinking? It's a castle not a friggin house! But I must admit, the family room is very comfortable. There's this huge fireplace, a huge white, furry rug, and two huge couches. Wow, I used huge a lot didn't I? Did I mention there is a huge, 61" TV also? I love the family room ^^;;.  
  
First Saruman directed us into the entrance hall. He told everyone to sit on the steps of a staircase (actually, we sat down without him telling us too) and then took a hat from a hall table (I think Sauron's castle decorations are kinda weird for evil people. I was expecting torches, chains, and torture machines, but instead the guy has tiki torches, paper link chains, and excersise machines. I seriously hope that the castle was re-decorated for us or Sauron's rep is majorly ruined),  
  
"All your name's have been put inside this hat, There are thirteen of you, and five rooms. I will draw your name's in threes."  
  
"What if you don't like your roommate?" asked Eowyn, I gulped, what if I got stuck with the smelly dwarf? I prayed to Yavanna that I wouldn't.  
  
"You'll have to deal with it." I was crossing my fingers and toes, I didn't mind anyone but the smell dwarf! Saruman began to draw our names. I think I was shivering throughout the whole ordeal. Am I weird or wat? These are the groups we got put into:  
  
1: Faramir Sam Airë  
  
2: Frodo Merry Gimili (HA!)  
  
3: Legolas Aragorn Pippin  
  
4: Eowyn Rosie Me  
  
5: Arwen (I feel kinda sorry for her cuz she's all alone in the creepy castle, but she seemed very happy about getting her own room all to herself)  
  
After that we were told to go to our rooms and unpack, then come back down to the dining hall for dinner. I really like the bedroom I'm in. Its on the south side of the castle, and faces the green fields and pretty trees outside of Mordor. The room is pretty sparsely furnished, it has three wardrobes, three beds, and one desk. The bedspreads were each unique, and, I thought, very pretty. The seemed to be in the colors we most like. Mine was striped hot pink and black. Eowyn's was white, and bordered with a dark red, flower trim. Rosie's bedspread was the most colorful, it had an entire garden printed on it.  
  
"Oh! I love my bedspread!" she exclaimed the minute we set foot in the room, "It reminds me of The Shire." "How do you know its yours?" I asked her, I didn't want her bed, I personally don't like cluttered bedspreads, but it wasn't like the bed had her name on it,  
  
"I don't, but I claim it."  
  
"Whatever." Eowyn said coming in after us, she had more luggage than both of us but together. One suitcase and three duffel bags I think. She threw them on the bed closest to the window and threw her stuff down upon it. That's how I became stuck with the middle bed, the one with vertical pink and black stripes. But I like, I really do. It also has these really pretty pillows. One is hot pink with black lace trim, and vice versa.  
  
"I'm sooo hungry.", typical hobbit, I thought, always hungry. I don't know a lot about hobbits, but their appetities are well-known in Middle-Earth. Rosie's stomach began to grumble, Eowyn and I burst out laughing. Now that we weren't riding in that god forsaken wagon, I felt much better, "What's so funny?" she asked with a grin. We assured her it was nothing, then all three of us went down to dinner. I personally don't like the dining hall. Its very large, and the table can seat up to tentwy-five people @_@. There are three diamond chandeliers hanging from the ceiling (Why do I keep stating the obvious?), and a wine cabinet in the corner. I have no idea why they have a wine cabinet. I guess Sauron didn't want it moved or something. It does, of course, have a lock on it. That sucks. ::evil grin:: we would've had tons of fun, if everyone got drunk! And no, you sick perverted minds, not THAT kinda fun. When I mean fun, I mean GOOD fun. I may be daughter of an evil elf, but that doesn't mean I'M evil!!!! ::glares::.  
  
"Hey Morniëranel! Come sit over here!" Arwen called to me from the head of the table. Do I need to state just exactly WHY she was sitting at the head of the table? She was surrounded by Faramir, Aragorn, Airë, and Merry. All of whom had been listening intently to some story or other that she'd been telling,  
  
"No thanks, it's a bit crowded over there."  
  
"Ok." I went over to where the hobbits (minus Merry), were sitting with Eowyn, Rosie, and Legolas. The dwarf Gimili was also sitting at the edge of their group, trying to be friendly. Poor guy. I almost feel sorry for him. ALMOST that is. I went and sat down in the middle of the group. Rosie had saved a seat for me.  
  
"Why are they taking so long????" moaned one of the hobbits, Sam I think.  
  
"Oh, shut up you arse." That was Legolas, who gave Sam an evil glare, Sam looked pretty hurt. Sheesh, my respect for Legolas is slowly decreasing! He should know that all hobbits are heavy eaters. I decided to say something,  
  
"So, where do you guys live?" I asked,  
  
"Weren't you listening when we gave our mini-bio things in the wagon?" I glanced at Pippin, he was the one who'd spoken to me first out of all the contestants,  
  
"Its not like it was a rule we had to follow," I looked quizzically at everyone seated near me, they were giving me those queer looks again, "Was it?"  
  
"Ummmm.yeah."  
  
"Oh no! Does this mean I'm going to be kicked out or something!?"  
  
"Just chill, it wasn't a real RULE, just something the driver said we should do to get to know each other better." Let me tell you, I felt very left out. Everyone knew each other except me!  
  
"Great!" I said, slumping down in my chair,  
  
"Its okay, we can do the mini-bio thing right now," she glanced at Sam, "It'll probably take our minds off the food. I'll go first. My name's Rosie, as you already know, I'm sixteen, and live in The Shire. Its really pretty there, especially during Autumn!" and it went on and on and on. Let me tell, you Rosie was the only one who told me anything about herself. Her "mini" bio took almost ten minutes. By the time she'd finished, the food had already been prepared. Mmmmm.Caesar Salad, Gumbo, and Smoked Salmon Fillet!! Yummy. Of course, Pippin, decided his food was just as good in his stomach as in other people's faces ^^.  
  
It started when Eowyn began talking with her mouth full, "I'm eating salmon. Seafood!" she said pointing towards her mouth, and laughing hysterically, I began to laugh a long with her,  
  
Pippin: Close your damn mouth! ::flings gumbo at her with his spoon:: ::This causes Eowyn just to laugh harder, and she scoops out gumbo with her hand and smushes it into Sam's face. Sam starts to cry, everyone else is laughing hysterically. I take aim at Legolas and the gumbo flies into his hair::  
  
Legolas: Shit! Not my hair! ::trys desperately to get it out:: NOT the hair! ::runs from the table:: ::suddenly croutons begin to rain on our heads from above::  
  
Merry: ::running to us across the table and flinging croutons at us:: Food Fight!! ::everyone begins to fling food::  
  
Me: Hey! Take that! ::I pick up my salmon fillet and throw it at him, he tries to duck, but slips and falls, breaking the table in half::  
  
SPLAT!! I look up to see my salmon fillet has gotten stuck in the chandelier, the momentum of my throw makes it fall almost on top of Merry, but he rolls away just in time. The chandelier doesn't break. Guess Sauron's not that rich after all. The chandelier was made of plastic ^^::  
  
::Faramir tips Aragorn's chair, and he falls over, taking his bowl of gumbo with him, which flies threw the air and lands on towards Frodo::  
  
Sam: ::running towards Frodo:: Nooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ::the bowl of gumbo hits him in the face and he faints::  
  
Saruman: ::his head is still in the kitchen, and he only has his body in the doorway:: Yes Withywindle, I think they love the food. ::turns around:: What the f*ck!?!? ::trys to step backwards quickly, but instead manages to throw himself backwards into the sliding door between the kitchen and the dining hall. It splinters, and he falls through:: Withywindle!!! Withywindle!!! I think I broke a nail!!!  
  
Hehe, and that was about it for the best part of the day. We had to clean up the mess, and Saruman was furious. After cleaning up, and ordering a new table and door for Sauron via the internet, Saruman made us all sit in the family room and he lectured us on the rules of the household. Why household? It's a frickin castle!!! It was more fun after he left.  
  
Airë: ::pulling out a glass bottle of vanilla coke from in between the seat cushions:: Lets play spin the bottle!!  
  
Me: You had this all planned didn't you?  
  
Airë: Well DUH. You didn't think that this bottle of coke MAGICALLY appeared in the couch do you? DUH.  
  
Frodo: What's spin-the-bottle?  
  
Eowyn: Like the best game ever made! Everyone makes a circle and the bottle goes in the middle. A random person spins the bottle, and whoever it lands on, they have to kiss. Then the person they kissed spins the bottle. If the person they land on is of the same sex, then THAT person spins the bottle.  
  
Sam: That's kinda confusing.  
  
Me: I don't want to play. (Is it just me, or is kissing people who I just met this morning just plain sick?)  
  
Airë: Anyone else to chicken to play the game? ::she trys to do an imitation of a chicken but it looks more like a seizure:: Baka ka! Baka ka! ::Eowyn slaps her::  
  
Eowyn: Get a hold of yourself!!  
  
Arwen: I don't really feel like playing either. (Actually, I think she just wanted to go upstairs where LEGOLAS was. I'd feel so sorry for the poor guy if he had to share a room with her.)  
  
::the two of us got up and walked up stairs::  
  
Me: I think you're obsessing with that elf. You don't even know who he is!!  
  
Arwen: What elf? (God, does she really think I'm that stupid?)  
  
Me: You know, the only other elf in this castle than us two?!  
  
Arwen: Oh him. Well, you've got to admit he's pretty damn hott.  
  
Me: Iwww!! No way! I think he's gay. Did you see how he spazzed out over his hair!?  
  
Arwen: No, I was at the other end of the table. But its ok to be a little vain.  
  
Me: Um.sure. But still, you don't even know who he is. In the wagon you were telling everyone about that poor guy named Feórn who hooked up with someone he didn't know and ended up in jail!!  
  
Arwen: But I DO know who he is! Not that I've met him before, but he's the Prince of Mirkwood!!  
  
Me: What!? Arwen, I think there was something in that gumbo, they wouldn't allow a prince to be part of this contest.  
  
Arwen: They allowed me, and I'm a princess.  
  
Me: I guess. ::I open my door and go inside:: I'm pooped. I don't know why exactly, but I'm still very tired. C ya in the morning!  
  
Arwen: Bye!  
  
That happened just a few minutes ago. Now, I'm sitting here writing in my journal. Let me tell you, I take back any feelings I might have had earlier about these people. I'm positive this'll be a very fun thirteen weeks.  
  
(----------------=+..+=-----------------) A/N: Tada! End of the 2nd chapter!! I hope you liked it so far! I know this one wasn't too funny, but I promise the next one will be!! And I'm sorry I kinda changed the writing to a more "movie-script" writing at the end of the story. It just seems funnier to me that way. I love reviews by the way!! love, Morniëranel 


End file.
